new year, new goals... new you?

happy 2013! i hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday! and of course, i hope 2013 has been a blast for all of you, and is treating you guys all well so far. (:

but! of course every year, we encounter something we like to call 'resolutions'. the unfortunate truth behind resolutions is that we never keep them (well, i personally don't at least!). and if we do, they usually last for about a few weeks or even a few months if we're lucky. they really are quite hard to maintain because of everything that goes on in our day to day lives. so to start this post off more formally... here are my resolutions for 2013:

1. be a more positive person. i tend to keep a lot bottled up inside of me, and 2012 really showed me how much it really affects me on a day to day basis. my negativity tends to make me feel helpless, useless, and most of all, pathetic. with all the pressure i put on myself and what others around me put on, i sometimes just feel like everything is falling apart, and that everything will go horrible, and i lose hope. it's such a draining feeling, all i did on weekends was sleep and feel bitter about the world. i'm hoping 2013 will be a happy year for me (even with the downsides), and i'll learn to deal with my 'demons' better.
2. in helping me become a more positive person, i want to ask God for help. so my second resolution... is to live a more God-centered life. i feel like i took him for granted a lot last year, and in turn, i guess it just added to me feeling utterly useless and unworthy of anything. but i do have faith in him, and i do know that even though i go through bad stuff, he has some really awesome plan for me, and he'll ultimately help guide me to a paved future. i'm hoping to attend church more, cut down on cussing (hahaha, fingers crossed!), and talk to him more.
3. become a more active student. and i mean this in the whole being-into-school sense! i've always been an average student, but i really hope to do better this semester because i'm taking classes i need to become a nurse, and most of you know that's all i've ever wanted. i'm hoping the excitement and hope i have of becoming a nurse takes me into a direction of being more into studying, less procrastination (hopefully............), and become a more ...knowledgeable person in the subjects. knowledgable in the sense that i can keep the knowledge in my head, and at any given time, explain it to people who don't quite understand it as well!
4. be more active on my blogs!!!!!! i do love talking to you guys, and i do sincerely apologize for being MIA! i'm going to try to blog as often as i can though. (:

so yeah! those are my resolutions for 2013. i know i'm not going to keep them the WHOLE year, but i'm hoping to! and i've thought of several ways to keep myself focused on these goals, and hopefully, these will also help you too!

1. keep your goals small! small goals are easier to reach because it's a way to accept change. i personally feel that with little changes, we're able to make them bigger, and have them grow, and ultimately allow us to reach the desired goal. with small goals, you can slowly build towards bigger goals without the constant nagging feeling of meeting it 10000000% every second. 
2. in addition to keeping them small, try to work them into your daily lives. that can simply be looking at them every morning, and setting goals from there. by keeping it in your daily life, it'll become a routine, and it will stick to you more. something you can try is keeping it on your phone if that helps, and setting it as your alarm if you have a note feature for your phone alarm! with the rehearsals of your goals, it'll slowly go into your long term memory, and voila! you'll be meeting your goal without even noticing it.
3. try, try, and try!!!!!! never give up on a goal because it's 'too hard' or it's 'too complicated'. to change, it has to be encouraged! trying is all anyone can ask for, even if it's yourself. no one can tell you you didn't try when you did. and trying is human, failures and successes are also human. it's part of life. it can be tough and sucky at times, but it's how we learn and grow.
4. tell people! telling people can help encourage you because they'll be able to remind you. they may also want to be involved if they have similar goals. feeling alone is definitely a factor that leads us to giving up. and we don't want that!!!

of course, those are all personal points i've given myself, and i hope they help you in succeeding whatever it is you have your mind set on!

do you guys have a topic you'd like to read? if so, pop me a comment down below, and i'll hopefully have some helpful insight! (:

i hope you guys have a fantastic weekend, and i'll talk to you all soon!

xoxo, yona

motivational speaker?

hello! i am now back with yet another advice post. i'm so glad i'm back, actually. i'm so sorry i've neglected you, blogger... i do love you oh so dearly. ):

anyways... when you're at a motivational seminar, it feels like you're sitting in on a herbal magic/jenny craig informercial taping. it feels so FAKE. does it really change you? is that what really happened? or are those things just things that happen on a daily basis, but is never noticed because you haven't been told to pay attention to them? i mean, i totally understand you wanting to change yourself in a way that you think may benefit yourself, like if you talk about yourself too much or if you're too emotional or not emotional enough.

think... if i asked you to think about a time where you thought of having a breakdown. what happened then? what went on through your mind? why did it happen? who caused it? how did you feel? how did you control it? or if i ask you to think about how you are as if you were talking to a mirror. would you like that person? what characteristics do you have that you like and dislike? you never pay much attention, because it's how we are built; we're built to not be aware of how we are around others. no, i don't mean it like you act all cute around a boy you like, or you're super shy in front of people but super out going with close friends. i'm talking about your personality. like if you tend to talk about you a lot, or talk about a certain subject.

the seminar i attended was, in short, YOLO. the speaker talked a lot about having breakdowns, and HOW to react to a breakdown, and more specifically, how to AVOID them. he mentioned things like thing of the reasons why you're feeling those feelings, think of the things you can do, think of what you did wrong and what you did right, and then think of solutions. yeah... thanks, captain obvious. it's natural for us to have breakdowns and react to our emotions, and it's natural for us to blame ourself AND others for our emotions.

so in the irony of this post, here are ways you can (hopefully) cope with a breakdown:

1. BREAK. DOWN. there's absolutely no shame in having a breakdown. heck, a breakdown might be that thing that helps us recover, and feel better in the end. breaking down is natural. and there is never a stupid reason to break down. ever. don't avoid it.
2. DO NOT BLAME IT ON YOURSELF. for whatever the reason is, you are not the blame for being human. breaking down is our minds way of telling us to take a break. all that emotion and thoughts built up has to get filtered out somehow, and well, sometimes that way is having a good cry.
3. DO TALK ABOUT IT. don't burden yourself the thoughts you have. tell someone you trust. they will listen, and i promise you that. and if you're afraid, you can always leave me a comment or pop me an email. i'll definitely try my hardest to help you, or i'll just be an ear. bottling up how you feel only makes it worse, and don't you get tired of feeling all that?
4. RELAX. after a good break down, relax. let yourself fix itself overnight.
5. DO THINGS AT YOUR OWN PACE. don't rush into anything because you think it'll help you in that specific moment. rushing into things might ultimately just cause you to ruin things even more, or it won't do much but start something that can be avoided. taking the time to think and pacing yourself to do things when you want to is probably the only way i can think of to help in any situation. i mean, you didn't learn to walk overnight, right? 

i'm not sure if any of that helped anyone, but that's now i cope with a break down. don't do what the speaker at my seminar said. don't yolo and make impulse decisions. don't go be all in other's faces and tell them how you feel. TAKE the time to do it. i do agree that telling others how you feel is a good thing, but being all up in their faces... that's a little too much, and that's a little scary to go into. pace yourself, and maybe just have a casual conversation about it! just please, don't yolo because you can... somethings aren't impulsive and needs time more than anything to work. yolo just... makes it go way to freaking fast and way, way, way too intense to handle. you'll probably just end up breaking down again later if it doesn't go as planned.

i hope this helped! and again, i'm definitely lending my ear to anyone who needs someone to talk to. (:

much love,
yona

hello, hello!

hello, everyone! how's it goooooin'?!

super-duper sorry i haven't been on here for... well for a LONG while! i may have forgotten the email and password for this....... ;)

BUT! have no fear! i WILL be returning for more advice! i do have a personal blog up that i use quite regularly-ish! the link will be posted near the end of this post, so don't freak!

but wow. i'm kind of glad i stumbled back onto this account. i've missed you guys!!!

well, i have a psychology midterm to study for, so hopefully i can post a bit after monday.

hope you're all well!

xo, yona

ps, the link to my personal blog is

nostalgic hearts

i honestly hate love.

I. Hate. Love.
I honestly do hate it.

I've never been so heart broken in my entire life... It's... eating me away. Literally.

As you have read in my previous post, I told you I posed. As Taylor Swift, I dated a Joe Jonas (Yes, he is still quite attractive!), and he was... wow. Unlike all the other guys/girls posing on Facebook, he ddint tlk lyk dis. I dislike people who talk like that, to be honest.

This Joe has perfect grammar, though some of his phrases were a bit... off. Off, meaning he went "tis" A LOOT. And said other weirdly put phrases...

ANYWAYS, no the point!
So, at the time, Joe and his girlfriend was going through a rough patch, and I decided to help him out. I remember my first inbox to him... "Are you okay?" I remember asking him that a lot. One thing I discovered about myself, is that I HATE frowns, and depressed people more than anything in the world.

Joe and I became best friends. We were tight. I was able to open up to him about my family, and he would sit there, and listen to me complain about EVERYTHING. I've never met anyone like that in my entire life. Soon, I started having a little crush on him.

About 3 weeks after we became best friends, he asked me to be his girlfriend. He left his 2 week girlfriend, and dated me. April 6th. It was the best day ever. He was the first, and only person I stayed up 'til 6 in the morning for. He was the first person to make me feel loved, and that nothing mattered when I was talking to him.

We had a month and a half long relationship, which ended by me "changing." He clamied after we went real, everything changed. I wasn't the "fun" and "flirty" girl he first me. I was this serious person. I did, however, break his heart. I didn't intend on doing that... But I really didn't think he thought it was a real relationship. Yes, I did love him. More than anything, but a guy who was as charming as him, must've had a million girls flaunting over him. I was wrong. I said I was single, and bam. He was broken. The next day, he broke up with me for his ex girlfriend, a girl who lied to him consistently, and played with his heart too. I was so hurt. I deleted him off everything, and I ignored him.

I felt bad. Guilt washed over me, and I apologized for my childish behavior. He forgave me, and it felt like nothing changed. We were still close. Soon, a Nick came into my life. Like Joe, he was charming, and sweet, and knew exactly what to say. We dated for 2 weeks... Until I found his true identity. Actually, he had 2 identities. His name, was Mimi, a girl posing as him, and soon, it became Jeydon, other wise known as Joe.

Mimi first made that account to make me happy. I was depressed, even though Jeydon and I were best friends again. I wasn't a happy girl. I had depressing status' everywhere. She made it, because she too, was in love with Jeydon, except Hanna, Jeydon's girlfriend, and Mimi's best friend, was still together. Jeydon had already lost feelings for Hanna though, and fell for Mimi.

July. July 10th. I got sent death threats. My life changed. I avoided the internet for legit 4 days, afraid I'd get more from them. I deleted everything, and blocked them for everything. But I didn't know they were reading my Tumblr still... So there I was, thinking I was all safe, when I was being stalked by two insane kids; one from Australia, and one from Montreal.

Eventually, I started going back on. I had summer school at the time, and I focused everything on Math. But when the Stampede rolled by... Every ride, I wished Jeydon was there with me... Pathetic, I know.

You might think it's crazy, but knowing this guy for 6 months... We seemed perfect. We'd finish each others sentences, and we'd read each others minds. We seemed perfect.

So on the 24th of July, I was formspringed by someone asking if I forgave people. I replied with "It depends on who they are, and what they did to me." I knew it was him. He was... He had a tough school life, and for a 16 year old, he was extremely wise... In his own way. He apologized, and told me he didn't mean to death threat me, and call me a bitch, slut and whore. He said it because he misread my blog. He told me it was all Mimi's fault.

Stupid me, I believed it. A week later, Mimi broke up with him, breaking him into pieces. I went in, as a friend, and tried putting him together. But there's this something about him that made me feel... It's just him that makes me fall in love with him, no matter what he's done to me. Soon, he confessed he loved me again, but he was trying to move on from Mimi.

It lasted for 2 weeks. 2 weeks of not sleeping until 6 in the morning. 2 weeks of constant Facebook and MSN. I even broke up with Stanley, this boy I love with everything. Stanley understood how I felt, and he took the time to put me back together. I thought he didn't like me, because he never showed it... But he did. A lot. I broke up with him, and found out he has a bipolar disorder. Being from Canada, I couldn't get to Stanley. He is from London England. I felt horrible. I over thought too much, and ended it with someone who genuinely cared about me.

Jeydon made me feel loved every second of my life... Until he found out Mimi had a boyfriend. He died. Mimi's ex was the boy whom made them break up. She LOVES attention, and her ex gave it to her. The attention she craved for, and the attention Jeydon lacked, apparently. He cried himself to sleep that night, and I knew I lost already. It didn't hurt as much as it did in the past... But I felt stupid. I broke up with someone I cared about, for someone who used me to get over their ex.

I was furious, and hurt. I did everything to try to make him happy. But she wins everytime. The bad guy wins. Typical movie scene. However, this time, I apologized to Mimi for whatever it was that I did, and she added me on msn.

She never once apologized. We're now in September.

2 weeks of "friendship", Mimi and him broke up once again. I, however, didn't love Jeydon anymore. I moved on. AFTER 6 MONTHS, I MOVED. ON. It was amazing. I talked him through everything, and I was there for him. But in the end, he got back with her, after she hurt him, by not trusting him, and ignored me. Typical Jeydon.

I was upset. He ignored me for the person who HURT me. But not only that... I found out Mimi knew everything about my life. My whole. Life. She knew about it. It hurt. I told them to him in confidence.

I was upset, and told my friends about it, and they raped his Tumblr. Eventually, Mimi's was raped, and just 2 weeks ago, I got raped by them, calling me the "bitchest of bitches" for telling my friends I was hurt, and giving them their links, AFTER they said they wouldn't do anything bad. Mimi called me ugly. She said I would never get a boy to love me. Never having kids. Never having a future.

Mimi said the dream of me becoming a nurse was a joke. She called me horrible things, and you know what? She broke me. Again. I cried for 3 nights straight.

Worst part is, she never apologized for anything. And Jeydon still follows her around.

Love is horrible. When you have it, it's amazing. When you get broken over and over again by the same person, you lose that trust for them.

The way I got played by the same people 3 times, and the words they said to me, made me realize I WON'T have a future. I'm not the type that guys tend to fall for. I'm chubby, and not that attractive.

I just wish someone would come along,and change my mind about love, and save me from the pain that is STILL in my life because of them.

Is it too late to wish I never met them?

But God put them in my life for a reason. I learned to not trust as easily, and I found out a lot about myself.

I used to think I was cold and heartless, when really, I didn't know how to show it. Through Jeydon, I realized how much care I'm capable of. Through Mimi, I realzied bitches are bitches, and no matter how much they "change", they'll always stay the same.

I hope you learn to move on, and let go of the past. For the heart broken ones, don't give up like me. You WILL find love. Don't wait for it. (:

Good night.
-Yona.

hello again!

Hello, hello! Sorry I've been gone for almost a year...
But I'm back now! And I have many more stories to tell...
So, you might be wondering what has been happening in my life these past 7ish months, well, I am now going to break it down for you!

December 27th, my life changed. I re accepted Christ into my life, even though I believed in him. I was going to get baptized, but something in my heart told me I wasn't ready, so I never really did get baptized. This story will continue on October 14th. (:

Now, confession time! Woo hoo. Haha. January 1st, 2010, I became... Taylor Swift. I started posing as Taylor on Facebook, and I DID NOT do it out of wanting to be famous, I gave up on that dream. I went on, because I felt lost, and confused, and something deep inside me pushed me to go for it... So, I did. I met a few people online, and that was awesome. This story will continue in the next blog I'm posting!

January 28th, I turned 15. Yay! Nothing really special went on there... It was pretty darn lame, to be totally honest with you.

February 13th, 2010. They day I became scarred for LIFE. Sorry! You'll have to wait until I post the story! ;)

Well, everything else basically happened like this: I fell in love with a guy from Australia. He broke my heart, and now, I'm living a teenage girls life, who has a broken heart from her first love.

Anyways, I changed a bit of my contact information, so I'll post them here!
Firstly, I changed my Twitter site, I got a Tumblr, and I changed my email. Feel free to add me, follow me, and email me. I'm a great listener, and I want to help you in any way I can. (:

Tumblr: misinterpretaions-.tumblr.com
Facebook: Www.Facebook.com/yona.chow
Twitter: Www.Twitter.com/xoserenity
Email: smilee.-@hotmail.com

Alrighty, stay tuned for more updates! I'm on my tumblr A LOOOOT, so yeah. Head there, and I'll follow/answer your asks!

I love you guys!

-Yona.

Fearless

So... I'm gussing you'are all wondering why I changed the blog title to 'Living Fearlessly'? Well... It's going to be explained in THIS blog! (:

So first off... CHIRSTMAS IS COMING! What do you guys want for Christmas?! I want to meet the Jonas Brothers... Taylor Swift, and get a few auditions! :P BUT... I main;y want my grandpa to be okay. He is pretty accellerated with bone cancer, and depending on how the report goes on Wednesday... he may or may not recieve treatment. I know... WORST CHRISTMAS EVER! BUT. I think I'm living fearlessly now. I'm starting to go through the ups and the downs of life, and I'm accepting the fact that there is such thing as life... and death.

I'm going to tell you now.. this isn't a post to convert you to Chirstianity... it's simply how I'm TRYING to help you guys get over something horrible, like death.

So I'm going to start off with a Bible passage... It is taken from the book of Ecclesiates 3: 1-8...

A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Bascially... this passage tells me what we are going through now... happens for a reason. We know we have to face death sooner or later. This bible passage... I first read in... Grade 8. It was found in the Dawn Rochelle series written by my ALL TIME favorite writer... Lurlene McDaniel. She is someone I look up to, and I've read nearly every single one of her books. It's pretty easy to decipher.. I'll try it! Haha! Sorry if it like... makes no sense...

2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot

verse 2 means we face birth... and death. New and old clash at some point. 'a time to plant and a time to uproot' is a metaphor for life and death. Plants, much like humans, are fragile. So, we sprout... we can't live forever. We get uproot... to make room for other plants.

3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

means something can attack us... killing us on the inside, but we'll all recover... never fully... but just enough that we won't forget them... but we can still carry on with life. Tearing down is basically... moving on, in order to make room for something else. You can't hold onto something forever... you have to let go.

4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

mourn is like... crying in a sense... and when you go to dances.. you usually have a blast! Which causes... SMILES! So we ALL go through up and down days.

5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,


God will give us hard obstacles. Scatter stones, is basically your heart being broken from a boyfriend... death... you lost a friend... whatever it may be. But we embrace it, and we move on, evne if it might repeat again. But we MUST stay strong, and keep smiling through hard times

6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

this one... is kinda harder to understand.... BUT I think it means that we are always looking for the 'one'. But we have to just give up. You WILL find that special someone sooner or later in life, but you can't keep holding on to a guy who... isn't there anymore, you need to forget them

7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

Hmmm... I guess it's saying something .. I don't really know... but the silent part is you STANDING UP. Don't let people step on you. YOU must stand up for something YOU believe in!

8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

That speaks for itself.

SO. What I've learnt over the years... the beginning starts with child birth... well YOU being born. But... is there really an end? I don't think so. I believe in eternal life... with God. Basically... EVERYDAY, we are adding to this book of ours... this special book we all have no matter what. Simply saying... we DO have an ending... BUT it's also a NEW book... tHe new bok starts with your death. Continuing on YOUR journey of life. We don't just stop after death... but we continue on... with God. With the desicion we make to... follow after death ; With God... or with Satan... It's YOUR choice, not mine or your best friends desicion to help you make.

SO... I hope you guys... understand a bit more about life and death. Live your life Fearlessly... and DO NOT get knocked over! Fearless is what YOU think it is! Fearless to me is living each day... happy and accepting, open minded. SO I want to wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year, and I hope you email me with questions, and comments! Thanks (:

-Yona

WORLD AIDS DAY

Today, I'm standing strong next to something I strongly believe in.


AIDS affects nearly 33 MILLION people WORLD WIDE. You may think


it's ONLY in Africa, but the truth is, 22 MILLION the the 33 million, IS Africa.


AIDS is treatable AND preventable. By joining ( RED ) on Twitter


www.twitter.com/joinred and the Facebook group (RED), you are helping


to spread the word about AIDS. Please go to your local Starbucks today,


and purchase and Product (RED) item, and 1 dollar will be donated. Only


40 cents a day can help someone with AIDS! It's that simple.





This is another reason why I started this blog. Not only do I want to help some


people out there, but also to raise awareness that I believe the world should know.


AIDS is one of them. Can you believe it? 22 MILLION people in Africa are suffereing


from this. People in our world today, are able to treat AIDS, but in Africa,


the have to travel many many days JUST to see a doctor! Let alone get clean


drinking water. I believe that fame isn't for the glory and money, it's to stand up


to things we believe in, and changing it. Demi Lovato has taken the stand against


AIDS, and I hope that someday, I can start spreading the news about AIDS worldwide


just like her.Please spead this to your friends, and December 1 is WORLD AIDS DAY.


Wear RED in support of WORLD AIDS DAY!



REMEMBER, JOIN (RED) ON FACEBOOK, AND START SPREADING WORD!
IT OLY TAKES ONE SPARK TO START A FIRE, ONLY ONE PERSON TO CREATE
CHANGE. YOU CAN BE THAT ONE. PLEASE.



Thanks alot! <3